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Ah! fhall not they defert the houfe's gloom,

Breathe the freth air one moment, and look fmart?
"Meet, in fome rural fcene, a Colin's fmile;
With Love's foft ftories wing the happy hour;
Drop in his dear embraces from the ftile,
And fhare his kiffes in the thady bower?
"No;" roars the Huntingtonian Prieft-" No, no!
Lovers are liars-Love's a damned trade;
Kiffing is damnable-to hell they go-

The Devil's claws await the rogue and jade.

"My chapel is the purifying place;

There let them go to wath their fins away;
There, from my hand, to pick the crumbs of grace,
Smite their poor finful craws, and howl, and pray.”
"How hard, the lab'ring hands no reft fhould know,
But toil fix days beneath the galling load,

Poor fouls! and then the feventh be forc'd to go,
And box the Devil in Blackfriars Road.

"Heaven glorieth not in phizzes of difmay;

Heaven takes no pleasure in perpetual fobbing; Confenting freely, that my fav'rite day

May have her tea and rolls, and hob and nobbing. "In footh, the Lord is pleas'd when man is bleft; And witheth not his bliffes, to blockade; 'Gainft tea and coffee ne'er did he proteft,

Enjoy'd, in gardens, by the men of trade.

"Sweet is White Conduit-houfe, and Bagnigge-wells,
Chalk-farm, where Primrofe-hill puts forth her fmile;
And Don Saltero's, where much wonder dwells,
Expelling work-day's matrimonial bile.

"Life with the down of cygnets may be clad!

Ah! why not make her path a pleasant track;

"No!" cries the Pulpit Terrorist how mad!

"No! let the world be one huge hedge-hog's back."

"Vice (did his rigid mummery fucceed)

Too foon would smile amid the facred walls;

Venus, in tabernacles, make her bed;

And Paphos find herfelf amid St. Paul's.

"Avaunt, Hypocrify, the folemn jade,

Who, wilful, into ditches leads the blind:
Makes of her canting art, a thriving trade,
And fattens on the follies of mankind!
"Look at Archbishops, Bishops, on a Faft,
Denying hackney-coachmen e'en their beer;

Yet,

Yet, lo! their butchers knock, with flesh repaft;
With turbots, lo! the fishmongers appear!
"The pot boys howl with porter for their bellies;
The bakers knock, with cuftards, tarts, and pies;
Confectioners, with rare ice-creams and jellies;

The fruiterer, lo, with richest pine fupplies!
"In fecret, thus, they eat, and booze, and nod;
In public call indulgence a damn'd evil;
Order their fimple flocks to walk with God,
And ride themselves an airing with the Devil."

THE MAN OF METHOD:
From the Purfuits of Literature. A Satirical Poem.

HERE liv'd a Scholar late (a) of London fame,

TH

A Doctor, (b) and Morofophos (c) his name:
From all the pains of ftudy freed long fince,
Far from a Newton, and not quite a (d) Vince;
In metaphyficks bold would spread his fails,
And with Monboddo ftill believ'd (e) in tails;
At anatomick lore would fometimes peep
And call Earle (f) ufeful, Abernethy (g) deep;

With

(a) When I am very particular in the defcription of the character, I abstain from giving the leaft hint of, a real name. Quis rapiet ad fe quod erit commune omnium? or in Le Sage's inimitable language, qui fe fera connoitie mal à propos?" I only give this as a A Character, and fay no more.

(b) The word and title of "DOCTOR" is miferably abuled. Erafinus long ago in an Epittle from Louvain in 1520 to the celebrated Cardinal Campeggio, oblerved with fome indignation, "Unde DOCTORIS titulo gloriantur, nifi UT DOCEANT?” Erafini Epift. Ed. Lond. Fol. 662. I with this were written in large characters over the door of the Theatre at Oxford, and the Senate-Houfe at Cambridge. (c) Morotophos. i. e. Stultè fapiens-But more prefently of Dr. MOROSO. PHOS, the Man of Method.

(d) A learned and ufetul Profeffor of Natural Experimental Philofophy at Cambridge. See his Works.

(e) All the learned world know how Lord Monboddo believed, and still believes, that men had once tails depending from the gable end of their bodies, fuppofing them to go upon all fours.

(f) James Earle, Eiq. Senior Surgeon at St. Bartholomew's Hofpital, and Editor of the celebrated PERCIVAL POTT'S Works. I have been informed that the notes which Mr. Earle has added are valuable; nor would I pafs in filence the treatifes he has given to the world in his own name, the refult of extenfive practice and obfervation.

(g) A young Surgeon of an accurate and philofophical fpirit of investigation, from whole genius and labours I am led to think, that the medical art and natural fcience will hereafter receive great acceffions.

(b) The

With Symonds, and with Grafton's Duke (b) would vie,
A Dilettante in Divinity;

Af pecial clerk for method and for plan,
Through fcience by the alphabet he ran.
Prudent, as Newton, in domeftick care,
With no Scriblerian (1) fcruples for his Heir,
He took, not e'en in thought inclin'd to rove,
A wife for regularity, not love.

A little architect in all his fchemes,
Some fay, he had a method in his dreams.
Three feffions in the House he daily toil'd,
In every plan, in every motion foil'd;
Till like grave Nicholls in pet he swore,
"I'll move myself; the Houfe I move no more;"
Then penn'd to Pitt his monitory ftrain, (k)
As Murray, clear, and as fond Randolph, plain.

Refolv'd on eafe, his travels were at home,
And Lum'fden (/) taught him to converfe of Rome :
The arch Palladian and the Parian ftone

He lov'd, the pride of Chambers and of Soane. (m)
But late, by Carter's (2) holy pencil won,
Wyatt and Gothick berely would thun;

And

(b) The Duke of Grafton the Chancellor, and John Symonds, L. L. D. Pro feffor of Modern Hiftory in the University of Cambridge, have both attracted the public attention by their various Hints and Obfervations on fubjects of Scrip

ture.

(i) See the Memoirs of Martinus Scriblerus. Chap. 1. How Dr. Cornelius obferved all the rules given by the antients to those who defire to generate children of wit, which Dr. Morofophos magnanimously difregarded. He neither cared for the South or the Weft Wind.

(k) The three great, yet familiar, Letter-witers of the age are, John Nicholls, Efq. M. P. for Tregony, 1797. Sir James Murray (Pulteney) Secretary to the Duke of York in Germany, and the Rev. Dr. Randolph.--See " A Pair of Epiftles in verse, with notes: the first to the Rev. Dr. Randolph, &c." 2nd edition, 1795. I recommend them to the general entertainment, and perhaps inftruction of the publick.

(1) That ingenious, accomplished, and very learned gentleman, ANDREW LUMISDEN, Esq. F.A.S. Edinb. has fince that time taught us all, in the most agreeable fcholar-like manner. See his "Remarks on the Antiquities of ROME and its Environs, being a claffical and topographical Survey of the Ruins of that ce Jebrated City." 4to. 1797. It is a pleafing and moft judicious performance of a Gentleman who appears to have enjoyed the united advantages of foreign travel, ftudious leifure, and polite company.

(m) Two celebrated architects. The profeffional knowledge of Sir W. Chambers, Knight, (of most heroick memory) was profound and fubftantial. Mr. Soane has more fancy and airiness of defign, and is certainly a man of information and ingenuity. But he indulges himfelf a little too much in extravaganzas and whims. See the Bank.

(") I am obliged for this information to a Fellow of the S. of Antiquaries.

Mr.

And oft in thought, by antique pavements laid,
With Lyfons guide the military spade;

And once, for purer air o'er rural ground,

With little Daniel went his twelve miles round.

On Sundays at Sir Jofeph's (0) never fail'd,
So regular, you might have thought him bail'd.
With Jones a linguift, Sanfcrit, Greek, or Manks,
And could with Watfon play fome chemick pranks;
Yet far too wife to roaft a diamond (p) whole,
And for a treafure find at laft a coal.

Would fometimes treat, his wines of chofen fort;
Will. Pitt, with honeft Harry, lov'd his (g) port;

In Scrip: not Hemings' (r) felf more vers'd than he,
The Solomons, or Nathan, or E. P.;

The Mr. Carter is a draftsman of the very firft merit, but his catholick zeal betrayed him, affifted by fome Morofopbifts of the Society, to attack THE FIRST GENIUS IN ARCHITECTURE, in this kingdom, MR. WYATT. Longa eft injuria: longæ ambages. It is difficult to prove that the Society of Antiquaries was inftituted, folely to preferve the purity of Go hick Architecture, or to liften to the tire fome cabals of buly Baronets, and meddling Romish priests.—But to us, under the au fpices of Wyatt,

O Fortunati quorum pia tecta refurgunt!

Æneas ait, et faftigia fulpicit urbis.

(0) SIR JOSEPH BANKS, Bart. Knight of the Bath, Prefident of the Royal Society, Privy Counsellor, &c. &c. has inftituted a meeting at his house in Soho Square, every Sunday evening at which the Literati, and men of rank and confequence, and men of no confequence at all, find equally a polite and pleasing reception from that juftly diftinguifhed gentleman. SIR JOSEPH BANKS is fitted for his ftation in the learned world, not more from his attainments and the liberality of his mind, than by his particular and unremitted attention to the intereft and advancement of natural knowledge, and his generous patronage of the Arts,

FORTUNÆ MAJORIS HONOS, ERECTUS ET ACER!

(p) The ingenious Mr. Tennant has fhewn, in a paper read at the Royal So ciety, that he can reduce a Diamond by evaporation to Charcoal. I have heard, that Mrs. Haftings, and other great poffeffors of Diamonds, have a kind of Tennanto- phobia, and are thy of this gentleman. A poor Poet, like myself, who has neither diamonds nor any thing precious belonging to him, can only remind Mr. Tennant and the Royal Society of the old proverb, "Carbonem pro Thefauro." (q) I can give no better character of his old Port. We all know on fuch oc. cafions, "Bacchum in remotis rupibus" is the fong of honeft Harry Dundas, in all the wildness of highland Dithyrambick; while Mr. Pitt, on the battlements of Walmer, in his own and Virgil's fober majefty, "OCEANO LIBEMUS. ait." (r) Dr. Morofophos now and then dabbled in the funds. The gentlemen of the Stock Exchange, or The College, (as it is termed in City-wit) are much indebted to that eminent calculator of different payments, Mr. Hemings. Boyd, Benfield, Solomon Solomon, Nathan Solomon, E. P. Solomon, Thelluffor, Old Daniel Giles, Mr. Battie, Lord Lanfdowne, Dr. Moore, Little Count Rupee, and all those who look an eighth better or worse for the opening, know that I am right, in pronouncing the panegyrick of this learned ciaffick on the Stock Exchange.

"Prens

The Bengal Squad he fed, though wondrous nice;
Baring his currie took, and Scott his rice.
Loyal and open. liberal of cath,

(Not your damn'd dollars (), or Bank-paper traf)
Nor tax, nor loan he fear'd, at table free,
And drank the Minifter with three times three;
Till with a pun old Caleb (2) crown'd the whole,
"Confols, and not philofophy, confole.”

He talk'd, like Indian () Rennell rather long;
And would at time regale you with a fong:
But feldom that; in mufick though a prig,
The little Doctor fwell'd, and look'd fo big:
Nay to Greek (x) notes would trill a Grecian ode,
In diatonick kind and Lydian mode,

And then with Burney, as his fit grew warmer,
Convers'd of Stentor, the great (y) throat-performer;
Or with Raimondi's fire, and warlike art,
Play'd fome French General's obligato part.
Banks gave him morning leffons how to dress,
And Morgan (2) whifper'd courage and fineffe.

A Foet

"Prens moi là bon parti; laisse la tous les livres.
"Exerce-toi, mon fils, dans ces hautes fciences;
"Prens, an lieu d'un Piaton, ce Guidon des Finances."
Avis de Boileau, Sat.8.

(s) This verfe was evidently written after the 26th of Feb. 1797, after the order of Council was fent to the Bank of England, when the whole nation wes made to pass through the pillars of Hercules; or in plain English, to take dollars for current filver.

(1) Caleb Whitefoord, Efq.-N. B. If you do but touch him, puns ftand as ready as quils upon the fretful porcupine. I wish him health and fpirits for many a year, in a green old age; and then with the Epinicion of Horace, Vita cedat,

uti conviva fatur.

(a) Major James Rennell, the great Geographer of India, & waw. A gentle. man to whofe accuracy and extent of knowledge this country is confiderably indebted. But this has nothing to do with his conversation.

(x) Dr. Morofophos, the man of method, was rather troublesome to his friends on this fubject of Greek Mufick. He wished to pafs for another Meibomius. But there is ftill reason to think that he never faw the three hymns to Calliope, Apollo, and Nemefis, printed with the Greek mufical notes to which they were fung, at the end of the Oxford edition of Aratus in 1672, by Dr. Fell, or the more accurate copy of theie hymns in Mr. Burette's Memoire on this fubject. Memoires de l'Academie des Infcriptions, tom. 5.-Dr. Morofophos knew but little of the fyftem of the Lydian Mode in the diatonick genus. There is alfo reason to think that he knew as little, as Bishop Horfley, of the ПporaμCarqueres, the Υπατη ὑπαων, or the Παρυπάτη μέσων, &c.

(y) "Stentor is celebrated by Homer as the most illuftrious throat performer of antiquity." Burney's Hift. of Music. 4to. vol. 1. p. 340.

(2) Maurice Morgan, Efq; an ingenious writer, author of the pleafant Extravaganza on the Courage of Sir John Falstaff. Mr. Morgan is known to his friends by the name of Sir John. In his politicks, he is of the Lansdown School.

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