Or who'd ha' supposed, arter sech swell an' bluster 'bout the lick-ary-ten-on-ye fighters they 'd muster, Raised by hand on briled lightnin', ez op'lent 'z you please In a primitive furrest o' femmily-trees, Who'd ha' thought thet them Southuners ever 'ud show Starns with pedigrees to 'em like theirn to the foe, Or, when the vamosin' come, ever to find Nat❜ral masters in front an' mean white folks be hind? By ginger, ef I'd ha' known half I know now, 'thout some un to kick, 't warn't more 'n proper, you know, Each should funnish his part; an' sence they found the toe, An' we wuz n't cherubs-wal, we found the buffer, For fear thet the Compromise System should suffer. I wun't say the plan hed n't onpleasant featurs, — But it worked jest ez smooth ez the key of a safe, An' the gret Union bearin's played free from all chafe. They warn't hard to suit, ef they hed their own way, An' we (thet is, some on us) made the thing pay: The elect gut the offices down to tide-waiter, bills, An' felt kind o''z though they wuz havin' their wills, Which kep' 'em ez harmless an' cherfle ez crickets, While all we invested wuz names on the tickets: Wal, ther''s nothin', for folks fond o' lib'ral consumption Free o' charge, like democ'acy tempered with gumption! Now warn't thet a system wuth pains in presarvin', Where the people found jints an' their frien's done the carvin', Where the many done all o' their thinkin' by proxy, An' were proud on 't ez long ez 't wuz christened Democ'cy, Where the few let us sap all o' Freedom's founda tions, Ef you call it reformin' with prudence an' patience, An' were willin' Jeff's snake-egg should hetch with the rest, Ef you writ "Constitootional" over the nest? Ef he'd on'y hung on for a month or two more, We'd ha' gut things fixed nicer 'n they hed ben before: Afore he drawed off an' lef' all in confusion, We wuz safely entrenched in the ole Constitootion, With an outlyin', heavy-gun, casemated fort To rake all assailants, I mean th' S. J. Court. Now I never 'll acknowledge (nut ef you should skin me) 't wuz wise to abandon sech works to the in'my, Andy Johnson or some one to lend 'em the wit With Columbiad guns, your real ekle-rights sort, But they wun't never dare tu; you'll see 'em in Edom 'fore they ventur' to go where their doctrines 'ud lead 'em : They've ben takin' our princerples up ez we dropt 'em, An' thought it wuz terrible 'cute to adopt 'em ; But they'll fin' out 'fore long thet their hope 's ben deceivin' 'em, An' thet princerples ain't o' no good, ef you b'lieve in 'em ; It makes 'em tu stiff for a party to use, Where they'd ough' to be easy 'z an ole pair o' shoes. If we say 'n our pletform thet all men are brothers, We don't mean thet some folks ain't more so 'n some others; An' it's wal understood thet we make a selection, it, You 're ept to hurt some folks's interists by it. For applyin' your princerple's wut makes it cost, A ginooine statesman should be on his guard, Nor it don't ask much gumption to pick out a flaw Thet we'd better nut air our perceedin's in print, The darned things 'll up an' mean sunthin' or 'nother. Jeff'son prob'ly meant wal with his "born free an' ekle," But it's turned out a real crooked stick in the sekle ; It's taken full eighty-odd year- don't you see?— You know I'm a feller thet keeps a skinned eye Coz it's of'ner by them than by gret ones you'll see Wut the p❜litickle weather is likely to be. Now I don't think the South's more 'n begun to be licked, But I du think, ez Jeff says, the wind-bag's gut pricked; |