for of Shandys, must have the nay-say of the seventh and eighth* I wish, when you come here, in case the weather is too hot to travel, you could think it pleasant to go to the Spa for four or six weeks, where we should live for half the money we should spend at Paris after that we should take the sweetest season of the vintage to go to the south of France but we will put our heads together, and you shall just do as you please in this, and in every thing which depends on me I am a being perfectly contented when others are pleased to bear and forbear will ever be my maxim - only I fear the heats through a journey of five hundred miles for you and my Lydia, more than for myself. Do not forget the watch-chains - bring a couple for a gentleman's watch likewise; we shall lie under great obligations to the Abbé M., and must make him such a small acknowledgment; according to my way of flourishing, 'twill be a present worth a kingdom to him -They have bad pins, and vile needles here - bring for yourself, and some for presents as also a strong bottle-screw, for whatever scrub we may hire as butler, coachman, &c. to uncork us our Frontiniac You will find a letter for you at the Lyon d'Argent Send for your chaise into the court-yard, and see all is right — Buy a chain, at Calais, strong enough not to be cut off, and let your portmanteau be tied on the fore-part of your chaise, for fear of a dog's trick-so God bless you both, and remember me to my Lydia. I am yours affectionately, L. STERNE. Alluding to the first edition. PROBABLY you will receive another letter, with this by the same post if so, read this the last It will be the last you can possibly receive at York, for I hope it will catch you just as you are upon the wing if that should happen, I suppose in course you have executed the contents of it, in all things which relate to pecuniary matters, and when these are settled to your mind, you will have got through your last difficulty every thing else will be a step of pleasure, and by the time you have got half-a-dozen stages, you will set up your pipes and sing Te Deum together, as you whisk it along. Desire Mr. C to send me a proper letter of attorney by you, he will receive it back by return of post. You have done every thing well with regard to our Sutton and Stillington affairs, and left things in the best channel if I was not sure you must have long since got my picture, garnets, &c., I would write and scold Mr. T, abominably he put them in Becket's hands to be forwarded by the stagecoach to you, as soon as he got to town. I long to hear from you, and that all my letters and things are come safe to you, and then you will say I have not been a bad lad for you will find I have been writing continually, as I wished you to do. Bring your silver coffee-pot, 'twill serve both to give water, lemonade, and orjead to say nothing of coffee and chocolate, which, by the bye, is both cheap and good at Toulouse, like other things I had like to have forgot a most necessary thing, there are no copper teakettles in France, and we shall find such a thing the most comfortable utensil in the house - buy a good strong one, which will hold two quarts a dish of tea will be of comfort to us in our journey south I have a bronze tea-pot, which we will also carry as china cannot be brought over from England, we must make a villanous party-coloured tea-equipage, to regale ourselves and our English friends, whilst we are at Toulouse I hope you have got your bill from Becket. There is a good-natured kind of a trader I have just heard of, at Mr. Foley's, who they think will be coming off from England to France, with horses, the latter end of June. He happened to come over with a lady, who is sister to Mr. Foley's partner, and I have got her to write a letter to him in London, this post, to beg he will seek you at Mr. E—'s, and, in case a cartel-ship does not go off before he goes to take you under his care. He was infinitely friendly, in the same office, last year to the lady who now writes to him, and nursed her on ship-board, and defended her by land with great good-will. Do not say I forget you, or whatever can be conducive to your ease of mind in this journey—I wish I was with you, to do these offices myself, and to strew roses on your way but I shall have time and occasion to shew you I am not wanting Now, my dears, once more pluck trust in God in me up your spirits and in yourselves with this, was you put to it, you would encounter all these difficulties ten times told Write instantly, and tell me you triumph over all fears; tell me Lydia is better, and a helpmate to you You say she like me grows let her show me she does in her contempt of small dangers, and fighting against the apprehensions of them, which is better still. As I will not have F.'s share of the books, you will inform him SO Give my love to Mr. Fothergill, and to those true friends which envy has spared me and for the rest, laissez passer - You will find I speak French tolerably but I only wish to be understood. You will soon speak better; a month's play with a French Demoiselle will make Lyd chatter like a magpie. Mrs. understood not a word of it when she got here, and writes me word she begins to prate apace, you will do the same in a fortnight Dear Bess, I have a thousand wishes, but have a hope for every one of them shall chant the same jubilate, my dears, so God bless you. My duty to Lydia, which implies my love too. Adieu, believe me Your affectionate, you L. STERNE. Memorandum: Bring watch-chains, tea-kettle, knives, cookery-book, &c. You will smile at this last article At Dover, the Cross Keys; at Calais, the Lyon D'Ar I WILL not send your ladyship the trifles you bid me purchase without a line. I am very well pleased with Paris indeed I meet with so many civilities amongst the people here that I must sing their praises the French have a great deal of urbanity in their composition, and to stay a little time amongst them will be agreeable. I splutter French so as to be Sentimental Journey, etc. 14 understood - but I have had a droll adventure here, in which my Latin was of some service to me. I had hired a chaise and a horse to go about seven miles into the country, but, Shandean-like, did not take notice that the horse was almost dead when I took him Before I got half-way, the poor animal dropped down dead so, I was forced to appear before the Police, and began to tell my story in French, which was that the poor beast had to do with a worse beast than himself, namely, his master, who had driven him all the day before (Jehu-like), and that he had neither corn nor hay, therefore I was not to pay for the horse but I might as well have whistled as have spoke French, and I believe my Latin was equal to my uncle Toby's Lillabullero being not understood because of its purity; but by dint of words I forced my judge to do me justice no common thing, by the way, in France. My wife and daughter are arrived the latter does nothing but look out of the window, and complain of the torment of being frizzled. I wish she may ever remain a child of nature I hate children of art. - I hope this will find your ladyship well that you will be kind enough to direct to me at Toulouse, which place I shall set out for very soon. truth, and sincerity, I am, with Your Ladyship's most faithful L. STERNE. |