of this transaction, but whose speed will be now very unexpectedly accelerated, and whose wheels, gentlemen, as he will find to his cost, will very soon be greased by you.

But enough of this, gentlemen. It is difficult to smile with an aching heart. My client's hopes and prospects are ruined; and it is no figure of speech to say that her "occupation is gone" indeed. The bill is down; but there is no tenant. Eligible single gentlemen pass and repass; but there is no invitation for them to inquire within or without. All is gloom and silence in the house: even the voice of the child is hushed; his infant sports are disregarded, when his mother weeps. But Pickwick, gentlemen-Pickwick, the ruthless destroyer of this domestic oasis in the desert of Goswell street-Pickwick, who has choked up the well, and thrown ashes on the sward—Pickwick, who comes before you to-day with his heartless tomato sauce and warming-pans-Pickwick still rears his head with unblushing effrontery, and gazes without a sigh on the ruin he has made! Damages, gentlemen, heavy damages, is the only punishment with which you can visit him-the only recompense you can award to my client. And for those damages she now appeals to an enlightened, a high minded, a rightfeeling, a conscientious, a dispassionate, a sympathizing, a contemplative jury of her civilized countrymen!

THE MERCHANT'S CAREER.-ANON.

"TARE and tret

Gross and net

Box and hogshead, dry and wet

Ready made,

Of every grade,

Wholesale, retail, will you trade?

Goods for sale,

Roll or bale,

Ell or quarter, yard or nail :

An editor sat on a lofty stool,

A very long pen was stuck in his ear: Before him productions from rogue and focl, In hieroglyphics not over clear.

He opened one, and he opened all,
More like a machine than a man
(How imperturbable editors are!)
And thus the medley ran :-

"Are you for taking the duty off tea?"
"What's the age of the Pope?"
"When will next Good Friday be?"

"Are you pretty well off for soap ?"
"Oblige me by stating the longest night."
"Did Shelley make a will?”

"Misther Heedetur, sur,

who von the fight, The Nobbler or Brummagem Bill?"

"Is bone-dust really made into bread ?" "Are the Jumpers increasing in Wales?" "Where is it that angels fear to tread ?" Have you tried the patent scales ?" "What color was Polyphemus's eye?" "Was the great Alexander a Spartan ?" "When may an oyster be said to die?" "Who's the oft-mentioned Betty Martin ?"

Now entered the office an inky youth,
A mass of most picturesque splashing,
"Twould have done him good, a dive after truth,
If but for the sake of the washing.
Awaiting the editor's orders he stood !

No emotion his tattooed face tinted;
Comets and corns were the same to him--
He did not care what was printed.

The editor handed the boy a list

That would cover a drawing-room floor,
And said, "Just insert these initials and say,
We have answered these questions before.
Then he savagely fell to biting his pen
(An unsatisfactory ration),

And said to the boy, "You can state again
The amount of our circulation."

The editor sat on his lofty stool,
Before him a sheet of foolscap lay;

So many subjects claimed his pen,
That he doubted what to say.

On a sudden he thought of the starving world,
And advised a plan to feed her:

He dashed his pen in the pliant ink-
Buy the paper, and study the "leader."

THE UNPRINCIPLED LAWYER.-G. W. LOVELL.

JACK SPRIGGS AND MR. BRANDON.

SCENE-A Street.-JACK SPRIGGS, alone.

Spr. More dirty work for poor Jack Spriggs! It's very odd, but nobody ever gives me a respectable job! It's hardextremely hard, upon my life it is! And what is a man to do that is born with refined tastes, educated in expensive habits, tortured with elegant desires, and can only earn eighteen shillings a week at regular work? Stop, here he comes. Defendant going to enter an appearance. Sergeant Spriggs retained for the plaintiff.

Enter BRANDON.

Ah, how d'ye do, Mr. Brandon? delighted to see you!-delighted to be allowed by my benignant fate, so early an opportunity of expressing my sympathy with your capricious fortune!

Bra. When I wish for sympathy, sir, I'll not forget to send for you.

Spr. (Detaining him.) Eh, stop-stop-stop!-you arn't offended, are you? I would not offend you for the worldupon my life I would not! Bless you, I'm a good-natured, well-meaning fellow, that never hurt the feelings of anybody. Why, I could tell you of men, that after my professionally lodging them in Newgate, have been the best personal friends with me in the world!

claim

Bra. When I owe you the same obligation, sir, I may a similar privilege. (Haughtily.) But I can postpone the pleasure till then.

Spr. Oh, come, nonsense !-don't take it so high and mighty. Bless you, I don't think a bit the worse of you for it. Bra. For it!for what, sir?

Spr. Come, come, now-that's too good-hang it !—Why, everybody's talking about it already; and I bet you five shillings it will be in the papers to-morrow. (Aside.) Took it to the Post, and Herald, myself, this afternoon.

ELL

Bra. Would you tell me, sir, that this wicked lie is being circulated?

Spr. Which lie? That you had committed suicide?

Bra. Which lie, sir?

Spr. Now, don't call me sir. It sounds so formal and unfriendlike. Nobody ever calls Jack Spriggs, "sir," except shark when he is serving a notice or a distress.

an to

Bra. Answer my question. Is the vile fabrication current, hab that I attempted the abduction of Miss Hardman ?

Spres

Spr. Oh, that it is, upon my word-upon my honor! Had it from all the servants of the house. Slight discrepancy in the evidence, to be sure. The coachman, footman, and groom, say one thing; the cook, both the house maids, and the lady'smaid, say another.

Bra. Sir, it is as false as

Spr. That's enough, that's enough! Don't trouble yourself for a simile. I believe you, my dear Mr. Brandon—I believe you, sir. Your word, that's enough for me. The bestser informed people are sometimes in error. I've known even a newspaper mistaken. But your word, sir-your word—I'm an quite satisfied-verdict, not guilty. Allow me to shake hands with you on your acquittal.-You leave this court, sir, with

an unblemished

Bra. Psha-But the scoundrel who has thus dared to assail my character—

Spr. Oh, don't fret about a little misunderstanding-all will blow over; old Hardy will relent-take you back again—

Bra. Never! not though upon his bended knees he sued me to return! The wild bird who has chafed so long against the wires, when once his cage is opened, will not be so easily lured back again. Tell him, I only feel that I am free.

Spr. I say, though, there's a little trough in the cage where the wild bird finds some seed when he is hungry; I've known him miss that very much when he has flown away. Poor thing! sometimes found starved to death a day or two after-eh ?-Don't take it ill; I take an interest in you-upon