IN THE STREET.

CALAI S.

I Never finished a twelve-guinea bargain fo exped

itioufly in my life: my time feemed heavy upon the lofs of the lady, and knowing every moment of it would be as two, till I put myself into motion I ordered poft horfes directly, and walked towards the hôtel.

Lord! faid I, hearing the town clock strike four, and recollecting that I had been little more than a fingle hour in Calais

)

-What a large volume of adventures may be grafped within this little fpan of life by him who interests his heart in every thing, and who, having eyes to fee, what time and chance are perpetually holding out to him as he journeyeth on his way, miffes nothing he can fairly lay his hands on.

-If this won't turn out fomething another will -no matter. 'tis an affay upon human nature I get my labor for my pains 'tis enough

the pleasure of the experiment has kept my fenfes, and the best part of my blood awake, and laid the grofs to fleep.

I pity the man who can travel from Dan to BeerSheeba, and cry, 'Tis all barren-and so it is; and fo is all the world to him who will not cultivate the

fruits it offers. I declare, faid I, clapping my hands chearily together, that was I in a defert, I would find out wherewith in it to call forth my affections

-If I could not do better, I would faften them upon some sweet myrtle, or feek fome melancholy cyprefs to connect myfelf to-I would court their fhade, and greet them kindly for their protectionI would cut my name upon them, and fwear they were the lovelieft trees throughout the defert: if their leaves wither'd, I would teach myself to mourn, and when they rejoiced, I would rejoice along with them.

The learned SMELFUNGUS travelled from Boulogne to Paris-from Paris to Rome-and fo on- but he fet out with the fpleen and jaundice, and every object he pafs'd by was difcolored or diftortedHe wrote an account of them, but 'twas nothing but the account of his miferable feelings.

I met Smelfungus in the grand portico of the pantheon he was juft coming out of it- 'Tis nothing but a huge cockpit*, faid he-I wish you had faid nothing worfe of the Venus of Medicis, replied I-for in paffing through Florence, I had heard he had fallen foul upon the goddefs, and ufed her worfe than a common ftrumpet, without the leaft provocation in nature.

I popp'd upon Smelfungus again at Turin, in his return home; and a fad tale of forrowful adventures * Vide S 's Travels.

had he to tell, "wherein he spoke of moving accid,,ents by flood and field, and of the cannibals. ,, which each other eat: the Anthropophagi"— he had been flea'd alive, and bedevil'd, and used worfe than St. Bartholomew, at every stage he had

come at

-I'll tell it, cried Smelfungus, to the world. You had better tell it, faid I, to your physician.

Mundungus, with an immenfe fortune, made the whole tour; going on from Rome to Naples from Naples to Venice-from Venice to Viennato Drefden, to Berlin, without one generous connection or pleafurable anecdote to tell of; but he had travell'd straight on, looking neither to his right hand or his left, left Love or Pity should feduce him out of his road.

Peace be to them! if it is to be found; but heaven itself, was it poffible to get there with fuch tempers, would want objects to give it-every gentle fpirit would come flying upon the wings of Love to hail their arrival- Nothing would the fouls of Smelfungus and Mundungus hear of, but fresh anthems of joy, frefh raptures of love, and fresh congratulations of their common felicity-I heartily pity them: they have brought up no faculties for this work; and was the happieft manfion in heaven to be allotted to Smelfungus and Mundungus, they would be fo far from being happy, that the fouls of Smel

fungus and Mundungus would do penance there to all eternity.

MONTRIU L.

I HAD once loft my portmanteau from behind my

chaife, and twice got out in the rain, and one of the times up to the knees in dirt, to help the poftillion to tie it on, without being able to find out what was wanting-Nor was it till I got to Montriul, upon the landlord's afking me if I wanted not a fervant, that it occurred to me, that that was the. very thing.

But why an They are fo fhot if this is

A fervant! That I do moft fadly, quoth IBecause, Monfieur, faid the landlord, there is a clever young fellow, who would be very proud of the honor to ferve an Englishman. English one, more than any other? generous, faid the landlord-I'll be not a livre out of my pocket, quoth I to myself, this very night-But they have wherewithal to be fo, Monfieur, added he- Set down one livre more for that, quoth I-It was but laft night, faid the landlord, qu'un my Lord Anglois préfentoit un écu a la fille de chambre-Tant pis, pour Mademoiselle Janatone, faid I.

Now Janatone being the landlord's daughter, and the landlord fuppofing I was young in French, took the liberty to inform me, I fhould not have faid tant pis-but, tant mieux. Tant mieux, toujours,

Monfieur, faid he, when there is any thing to be got -tant pis, when there is nothing. It comes to the fame thing, faid I. Pardonnez-moi, faid the landlord.

* I cannot take a fitter opportunity to obferve once for all, that tant pis and tant mieux being two of the great hinges in French conversation, a stranger would do well to fet himself right in the use of them, before he gets to Paris.

A prompt French Marquis at our ambaffador's table demanded of Mr. H-, if he was H-the poet? No, faid H mildly-Tant pis, replied the Marquis.

It is H the hiftorian, faid another- Tant mieux, faid the Marquis. And Mr. H, who is a man of an excellent heart, return'd thanks for both.

When the landlord had fet me right in this matter, he called in La Fleur, which was the name of the young man he had spoke of faying only firft, That as for his talents, he would prefume to say nothing Monfieur was the beft judge what would fuit him; but for the fidelity of La Fleur, he would stand refponfible in all he was worth.

The landlord deliver'd this in a manner which instantly fet my mind to the business I was upon and La Fleur, who ftood waiting without, in that breathless expectation which every fon of nature of us have felt in our turns, came in.